Anyway, another guy who has fallen off my radar a little is Mad Ogre. Again, without an RSS feed, I can't put him in my techno-wonder list over there, so he languishes down in the link list. If you've been reading this blog since the beginning, you might even recall that I launched this project with a series of attacks on established bloggers, starting with Ogre. I figured that the tried and true secret to success on the internet was to make yourself look like a big man by tearing others down, so I figured I'd start things off right . . . . but I digress. The point is, today I had an extra moment and I checked in on Ogre. Look what I found:
WTF is this. The Armed School Teacher isn't linked? The guy that out Ogred my majestic Ogreness? Wow. WTF is wrong with me? Okay, he's linked and he's near the top now. Forgive me, Don. Dude – you don't need to pull an Ogre, if you can pull of Jayne Cobb's cunning hat. I wouldn't even DARE try that. Okay, now to clarify something. I did get shot in the chest with a .45. But it did not go through my chest. It was stopped by my vest and I still have the bullet. It's on the keyring to my green full sized Bronco, aka, Brutus. Had it penetrated, I would probably lost 3 out of 4 ventricles in my heart. Thanks to the vest, I'm still here, married to my achingly beautiful, non-ogrish, healthy chested, libertarian, dancing goddess, wife and we have six boys. No, I am not green. I'm too Scots/Irish to be anything but pale and reddish. I've turned greenish tint on occasion, but some Pepto helped that. I turned yellowish once, lots of water and antibiotics helped that... and every year I turn brown... but then I peel and I'm back to the paleness that would rival the Vampire Edward from Twilight... I'm so pale my belly looks like a trout. It glimmers in direct sunlight too. So do my legs, even at night – they are that pale. Don Gwinn – AKA: GwinnyThePooh. Good guy. Smart and full of snark. If you have not bookmarked him yet, your doing it wrong. How THE HELL has Don not been linked? WTF?
He's not fooling me for a second. I see exactly what he's up to here. He's pulling the oldest trick in the book. I attacked him and dragged him down in order to make myself feel like a big man and attract readers; he has responded with the classic defense, which is to be the bigger man and make me feel foolish for lashing out. What he may not realize is that I have no shame. Well, that and a wandering digression culminating in a description of his shimmering vampire fish-belly . . . . if you understood what that was all about, hey, you tell me.