Love of My Life: "Your windshield was so filthy I pulled in and washed your car."
Your Intrepid Hero: "Thanks, Honey!"
LML: "I also cleaned it out. And vacuumed."
YIH: "Wow . . . thanks, Honey!"
LML: "And I tried to put the book back in the glove box, but I couldn't."
*** Pregnant Pause ***
LML: "Because there was a huge wad of cash in the glovebox!"
YIH: "Oh, yeah!"
LML: "Why is there a huge wad of cash in the glovebox?"
LML: "Yes. Why?"
YIH: "Well, I told you I was saving up EMS paychecks . . . you know, to go to that course."
LML: "How much does 'that course' cost?"
YIH: "Uh . . . The Farnam course?"
LML: "Yes. How much does it cost?"
YIH: "Uh . . . about . . . . $400?"
YIH: "Do you want me to skip it?"
LML: "Nope. But I'm glad you locked the glovebox."
(There's a kiss here and it gets kind of mushy. You see, this is my Father's Day present. For Father's Day this year, I am allowed to save up my ambulance-driving paychecks to pay for a shooting course. I wanted to do LFI-1 this year, but I got around to it too late. This course is probably actually better for me, relatively untrained n00b that I am, but it's more expensive--and although I wouldn't have lied to her about it, I figured it would be easier to explain after the money order had been sent. That was dumb. She's a hell of a woman.)
Schlock Mercenary: January 19, 2017
17 minutes ago