Saturday, March 14, 2009

Does Your Lie Count If I Don't Pretend to Believe It?

The latest column from the Atlanta Gun Rights Examiner discusses the perplexing case of Bearden v. Atlanta. Tim Bearden sued the city of Atlanta; he contends that a new Georgia law establishes that it is unlawful to prohibit CCW license holders from carrying concealed firearms on public transportation, including buses, trains, and in airports (at least the unsecured zones.) The City of Atlanta argues that the new law was not intended to apply to airports, and therefore its ban on carrying weapons in Atlanta's airport and its parking lots still stands. The court agreed with the city, upholding Atlanta's prohibition on the grounds that the bill Bearden cites was never intended to apply to airports.

Sounds pretty straightforward unless you know that Tim Bearden was the legislator who wrote the law. Read the whole thing, but duct tape your head first to avoid explosion.

"This is what the law means."
"Nuh uh."
"Well. . . . but . . . . I wrote the law."
"Yeah, I know. Whattya want, a cookie?"
"Well, no, but . . . I mean, I remember writing the law."
"I remember doing your mom. Do I get a prize, too?"
"That's really not . . . look I remember writing the law, and I remember choosing my words carefully so that it would apply to the airport."
"I'm sure you honestly believe that, but on the other hand, no you didn't."
"I'm pretty sure I did. Plus, we debated that bill on the floor, and the airport issue came up. I said it then, too."
"You're confused. You look tired. You're getting . . . . sleeeepy."
"What?"
"Nothing. Are we done here?"
"You're just going to keep saying weird things and stonewalling, aren't you?"
"We could talk about your mom some more."
"Yeah, we're done."

4 comments:

Anonymous said...

WTF!!! I didn't heed your advice and produced that faint report you just heard from the north. :)

Don said...

You were warned. You have no one to blame but yourself.

J.R.Shirley said...

God friggin' dammit. Jeezus.

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